When the Cookie Crumbles
Last week, my husband, who barely knows how to fry an egg,
asked me to teach him to bake
cookies. So we lined up ingredients, and he rolled out a tasty batch of Cream
cheese sugar cookies. This week, Bill wanted to make his grandmother’s sugar
cookies.
We cut the recipe to five instead of 10 cups of flour
(thank goodness). After measuring, mixing, rolling and baking, several dozen
decent-looking sugar cookies line the counter. So we sit back to enjoy a warm
cookie. Ahhhh. No! Arrgh! Something tasted off!
Might it have been the two-years-out-of-date dry
buttermilk I gave him to use? They only put those dates on products so you buy
more. Right? Buttermilk is nothing more than sour milk, so what can go wrong
with a can nestled in my refrigerator for several years?
As I scooped them into the wastebasket, Bill said, “At
least save a few to eat with coffee. That might help the taste.”
We are now in our 61st year of marriage. For
Valentine’s Day, I’d like to share some ideas with you young ‘uns about what
has kept our love light burning through the centuries . . . in spite of sour
buttermilk.
We learned to rely on each other. We both graduated
college at the same time, and we had married a year earlier. The first place we
interviewed for teaching jobs said because we might have differences and
students might sense tension, they wouldn’t hire us.
Then the superintendent of
schools from Alexandria, Virginia, came to Bloomsburg State College to
interview. He said our marriage would be no problem. We wouldn’t see each
other. I taught at a high school, and Bill taught in a trailer outside an
eighth grade school with 800 students.
Immediately after we graduated,
we loaded our car with those wonderful wedding gifts and off we went, three
hours from home, to teach summer school. So those first years of marriage we
couldn’t go running home to mama when we had a spat. We, who grew up in a rural
area, were alone in a big city with one car. You bet, we learned to rely on
each other.
We learned to allow separate interests and find similar ones.
Bill likes hunting, sports and woodworking. I like to read and write. But we
sit side-by-side to solve jigsaw and Sudoku puzzles.
We learned to give each other space and grace. When we’re
pursuing our separate interests, we like to be alone. But if Bill “visits” my
office when I’m writing, that’s fine too. And vice versa, if I interrupt his
woodworking.
We learned to help each other out. I help him find things
in the refrigerator. He finds everything I lose, even the back of an earring in
a cardboard newspaper box in the garage—months after I lost it.
We learned to rub our feet and walk on when we stepped on
each other’s toes.
We learned not to criticize each other for mistakes (see
opening story).
I learned I am not always right (see opening story).
I treasure the pendant Bill gave me for my last birthday.
The engraving on the back reads: Shirley, I loved you then, I love you still. I
always have, I always will. William.
We’ve learned to treasure each day the Lord gives us.
Life becomes more fragile as you age, and suddenly heaven awaits. But you want
to see grandchildren marry and cuddle great-grandchildren. You want to write
another book, build another birdhouse. There’s always something that makes you
want to live on. And that’s good. But we know life’s going to end.
So we do our best to leave a legacy of grace and faith,
and we wish the same for you.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
2 comments:
Very wise words of wisdom, Shirley! I so enjoyed reading this post. Life is interesting navigating your likes and differences with a spouse. But it can be so beautiful when we take the time to truly see each other and value the other as an image bearer of God.
Thank you for sharing your cookie story and the wisdom of a recipe for a healthy marriage.
Hugs!
Thank you, Gigi. It's a beautiful and interesting journey, for sure.
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