Friday, January 29, 2021

Do Clothes Make the Woman? Or Does the Woman Make the Clothes?

 



I often say to my husband, “Picture this!” Then I describe a gold sheath dress I wore when we dated accessorized with a gold-studded belt and a multi-strand gold-balled necklace (still have the necklace). In my “picture this” frame of mind, we’re standing on a braided rug, inside the door of my farmhouse, saying goodnight after a Saturday night at the movies.

Why do I talk like this? Because it takes me back to a happy time, a happy place. Little did we know about the cares of child-rearing, the stress of relationships, the pain of sickness, the challenges of aging. How naïve we were. And how happy.

“Take me back,” I say. “Take me back to those carefree days.”

It’s funny how what we wore at benchmark moments serve as markers. Markers of happy times. Sad times. Run-of-the-mill times. Strung together, they tell the story of our lives, a multi-faceted, layered concoction. And we learn so much living through them. We learn to embrace the good and survive the bad. We grow in character and strength:

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience” (Colossians 3:12 NIV).

My mother sewed many of my childhood clothes from feedbags. That’s right. I went with my father to the local mill where feed for our cattle came in patterned bags, perfect for housewives of the day to sew into dresses. I learned humility wearing “homemade” clothes because I sometimes wished for more “store-bought dresses.”                                          

Once a year, however, we shopped for new Easter dresses. I remember a pink organza embroidered with white daisies when I was maybe 7. Worn with hat and little white gloves and Mary Jane shoes. Oh, how special I felt. In childhood, I learned to appreciate what I had instead of grieving for what I didn’t have.

I remember the yellow dress I wore for a son’s baptism. A happy time, for sure. But raising children teaches you gentleness and patience as you navigate the crying and the trying that goes with family life.

I picture the royal blue velvet dress with red lacing up the front that I wore to my grandmother’s funeral at age 7. My first brush with death. Then there’s the black dress I wore to my father’s funeral and the pink vest and skirt that I wore to the funeral of our infant daughter. Oh such sad times. They taught me compassion for others who suffer loss.

In my early 30s, I wore a royal blue wool sheath to walk to the front of a church to dedicate my life to serve God, however He might call me. A monumental moment. And then I patiently waited for God’s direction.

The years flew by. I gained weight. I lost weight. I taught school and acquired what I considered a “dressy” wardrobe. In those days there were no dress-down days. I loved shirtwaists. Two-piece dresses that worked for my lanky body. Dressy, but not too. I hope my students remember me as a kind teacher who treated them fairly.

For our first big out-of-state event, Kim, Janine and I shopped, coordinating colors and textures. Public speaking taught me perseverance as we traveled, slept in strange beds and worked on effective presentations.

These days my style consists of turtleneck sweaters and slacks. Dressy clothes droop in the closet. No dress-up days in sight. But I’m learning patience as I wait for times I took for granted—going to church, having dinners with my family, celebrating birthdays together.

Clicking from image to image in the photo album of my life, I see a mosaic of color, texture and meaning that God melded into a unique individual. I am a product of my generation, a product of the culture of my day, a product of my faith. The outfits I wore at pivotal moments tell the story of a girl who aspired to be a wife, a mother, a teacher, and was blessed to achieve all three.

Take a moment and think back to pivotal moments in your life and what you learned from them. Then thank God that just as we put on a fresh outfit every morning, God teaches us fresh lessons each day. Let’s learn and grow together. This is one journey that never ends.



Saturday, January 16, 2021

CORRECTION to Book Review

 In yesterday's book review I wrote that Lynn Austin is the author of Hidden Figures. That is an error. She is the author of Hidden Places. So sorry about that.

Friday, January 15, 2021

Book Review: A Woman's Place

 


Maybe it’s because I’m old enough to remember the era, but this was one of the most compelling novels I’ve ever read. Written by the Lynn Austin, author of Hidden Figures, the story revolves around four women from disparate backgrounds who end up working as an electronics team at a shipyard during World War II.

 Rosa is a fiery Italian newlywed whose husband has gone to war. Ginny, a housewife turned factory worker to escape a non-communicative husband. Helen is a rich girl with a past she keeps to herself, and Jean, the team leader, came from a family of 18 children with several brothers fighting in the war.

 The story clearly shows how society viewed women. You may be surprised to learn that once a woman began to “show” in pregnancy, it was pretty much assumed she would quit working. It was also a segregated society, and the author notes that aspect.

 A Woman’s Place is an enjoyable, true-to-the-era story that you can’t put down. You keep wanting to know more about how things turned out for these four women with indomitable spirits.

 


Saturday, January 9, 2021

The Gift of Giving


             I love shopping for gifts, choosing just the right present for that grandchild that leased her own apartment, for that son who devours books like most of us devour cookies. And this year, shopping by Internet made me happy. I just Googled an age and interest and took my pick.

            I also love unwrapping gifts. I’m amazed at how well my daughters-in-law and grandkids know me. (I know my sons are not the shoppers.) This year for Christmas one son’s family gave me art work by my favorite artist while the other gave me 100% cotton towels that replaced the ones I’ve trimmed fringes from for ages. And these new ones are the most amazingly soft towels I’ve ever used.

            Epiphany on January 6 marks the visit of the magi to the manger. Did the wise men think long and hard over the gifts they offered to the baby Jesus? They couldn’t Google, so how did they choose gold, frankincense and myrrh? Tradition assigned names to the magi: Melchoir, from Persia; Gaspar, from India; and Balthazar, from Arabia. How did they get together anyway? We don’t know.

But we do know the significance of their gifts. Gold was a precious metal, fit for a king. Frankincense was a holy oil, fit for a priest. And myrrh was a substance used for embalming, fit for a suffering Savior.

            How did these magi feel after visiting Jesus? I once saw then President Bush when he visited our area. I came away awed at seeing someone of such stature.

The magi somehow knew Jesus was a king, so they must have come away floating on air. They themselves were kings. But they had just met the King of kings.

Did the gift giving of the magi inspire our Christmas gift-giving? Or do we give gifts because God gave us the greatest gift of all—His Son Jesus? Probably both.

“Giving” actually is a gift to the giver. It really is more blessed to give than to receive. And the year holds plenty of opportunities for gift-giving—birthdays, holidays, spur-of-the-moment surprises. So what might we give that sparks joy in the receiver—and in us?

Gold:

Of course, I give wrapped presents to those I love. It gives me as much or even more joy to watch them open their gifts than to open mine. These are gifts of gold. My family deserves the best.

I also give to charitable organizations and to the benevolent ministries of my church or community. It feels good to know I’m filling someone’s oil tank or helping them buy gifts for their children.

Frankincense:

There are ways of giving that don’t require wrapping paper or checks. I give the gift listening whenever a friend shares a problem. That gift costs me nothing but is most precious to the receiver any day of the year. And I feel good about listening. I offer my opinion. I remind them God is with them. It blesses my heart to listen.

Temple visitors enjoyed the fragrance of the oil of incense, and so the fragrance of our gift of listening lingers with others after we part.

Myrrh:

Then there’s the gift of myrrh, which represents suffering. We give as we suffer with others. We send sympathy cards. We attend funerals. We hug and share in another’s sorrow. And we come away knowing we have contributed to their healing.

But There’s More to Give:

We all have spiritual fruit to give as gifts as well: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. We distribute these through relationships. Don’t you feel good when you hold a door or pick up something for someone? When you stop an argument with a gentle response? Of course, you do!

And then there are the spiritual gifts. The gift of hospitality does no good if we never open our doors to others. But once we enjoy the feeling of satisfaction that comes after hosting a Bible study, we’ll do it again. And again and again.

And although hospitality in our homes is limited by COVID, we can be hospitable whenever we reach out to others to let them know we care.

The gift of teaching blesses others and surely blesses us as help others understand a concept. The list of spiritual gifts and blessings to the giver goes on. Can you imagine how blessed God feels when He sees us appreciating the gifts He’s given to us?

All that to say, giving is a gift in itself. It blesses others, but it also blesses our own hearts and our souls. So be sure to enjoy giving this year. It’s not a chore. It’s not a duty. The gift of giving is a privilege given to you and me by a Giving God.